Enduring Light Read online

  “I know he’s a Cipher, Mom.”

  We’d also come to accept that Blake was something that was thought to exist only in legend. He was the antithesis to an Essence—to me. She was right, but I hated the thought of not being able to use my abilities. It was the only way I ever felt useful. Otherwise I was more of a burden than an asset.

  I pushed those thoughts away. “We’ll be careful,” I said. “Do you even need to say that? It’s me we’re talking about.”

  “Yeah, and you did wander through the gate you were explicitly told to stay away from.”

  “True, but that’s different.” I ran my hand through my knotted hair. I was in desperate need of a brush or something to tie up my hair. Mom read my mind and handed me a piece of leather. I used it to pull my unruly locks into a messy bun. It would have to do.

  I also needed a bath, but I wasn’t interested in another icy plunge in the river. I’d already had my one bath of the week in the caves. I could have used the Essence card to get someone to heat water for me, but it was such an ordeal that I didn’t want to deal with it.

  “How is it different?” she asked.

  I shrugged. “It just is.” It seemed a lifetime ago that I had stepped through the old garden gate. I’d had no idea at the time how huge a step it really was, how much would change. I glanced around the small clearing where we stood, mere steps from a thick fern grotto. Sometimes something as simple as the foliage reminded me of how far we were from home.

  “How’s the coffee?” Liam took the mug from my hand and sipped it. “Nice.”

  “Get your own.”

  He grinned. “Why? Never learned to share?”

  I pulled my mug back from him, nearly burning us both in the process.

  “Okay, I forgot. I shouldn’t try to come between you and coffee.”

  I laughed. “You of all people should know that.”

  Mom just smiled again. Maybe watching us let her imagine what I was like when the weight of all the worlds wasn’t on my back.

  Henry reappeared with a heavy pack slung across his back. “I think we’ve got everything.”

  I was glad he’d be around to help keep things light. Without James, I needed that. Henry and I had become good friends in the year he’d spent in Charleston. I’d missed his humor on my last journey.

  I glanced around for my Gerard. “Where’s Calvin?” I could feel his presence, so I knew he couldn’t be far.

  Henry dropped his pack on the ground. “He’s getting the horses ready.”

  My chest clenched at the word horses. It brought back memories of my first time on a horse—with James. Even though I’d learned to keep the truth to myself, James’s comatose state was one of the biggest motivations to find the scroll. All I knew was that I was the only one who’d be able to understand the writing, and that without it, we had no clue how to vanquish Blake. I tried to stay positive, but part of me was terrified I wouldn’t be able to read it. I wanted to defeat Blake, but I also needed to save James. As unbelievably annoying as he could be, he was one of my best friends, and he was only unconscious because he had protected me.

  “You okay?” Liam asked gently. He was always able to figure out what I was feeling, no matter how hard I tried to hide my emotions. I wished he couldn’t. Sharing my feelings wasn’t high on my to-do list.

  I forced a smile. “Yeah, I’m okay. If we’re that close to leaving, I need to find Kevin and Monty.”

  “I’ll come with you. I think they’re getting ready to leave soon, too.” Mom gestured for me to head inside ahead of her. She didn’t actually say it aloud, but I knew she was nervous about Kevin seeing Dad. She wanted to go with him, just as she wanted to go with me, but she needed to stay with the Resistance. Someone from our family needed to be there. It wasn’t an edict or anything, but the presence of a Winthrop gave some more authority to the group—helped the morale a little. Monty had offered to stay, but Mom figured he’d have a better shot at helping Kevin. I wondered if she was afraid to face Dad. Her getting kidnapped obviously wasn’t her fault, but she had left him with a heavy burden to bear.

  “There you are.” Kevin’s tall form nearly took up the entire mouth of the cave.

  I crossed my arms. “You make it sound like you’ve been looking for me.”

  He stretched his arms above his head. “I have. I feel like I’ve barely seen you, and now we’re leaving again.”

  I shrugged, trying to play off just how much I agreed with him. “You know what they say, ‘Absence makes the heart grow fonder.’”

  “I think I’d prefer to hate you than to have to leave you here.” He led the way back inside. Liam and Henry stayed outside. They probably assumed we needed some family time.

  “Aww, how sweet.” I still had to give my brother a hard time sometimes. Old habits die hard.

  “So, Mom. How do you feel about Charlotte going off with three guys?”

  Mom shook her head. “Considering one’s her Gerard, I’m not too worried. I should probably be more worried about you.”

  “Afraid Samantha’s going to take advantage of me?” He laughed.

  “No, it’s the other way around.”

  Kevin let out a small grunt. “Geez, what a vote of confidence.”

  “You know what I mean. Samantha’s from Energo; she’s not experienced. The lost world is going to be a shock for her even without you pushing her.”

  Kevin looked incredibly uncomfortable with where the conversation was heading. “Monty’s going with us. I wouldn’t worry.”

  Mom seemed to relax a little. “True enough. All right, you two. Don’t leave without saying goodbye. I need to check on supplies.”

  Kevin waved. “See you in a few.”

  I turned to Kevin. “I heard Talen’s going with you.”

  “Talen? Why’s he coming with us?”

  “He’s an arctic wolf. Don’t you think he might come in handy up in Alaska?”

  Kevin pulled an apple out of his pocket and took a bite. “I guess. I just don’t know him well.”

  “Aren’t I supposed to be the anti-social one?” I tried not to drool, but I hadn’t had a normal fruit like an apple in a while. I had no clue where he’d found them, but Kevin usually managed the impossible.

  He smiled, pulling a second apple from his other pocket. He tossed it to me. “I liked it when you were. Mom might not care about you alone with three guys, but I do. I don’t care that Calvin’s your Gerard. You’re still too young.”

  I took a bite of the crisp apple. “I’m seventeen.”

  “Way too young.”

  “He’s a good guy.”

  He tossed his apple core into a bin. “Maybe. I know I should trust him, but I don’t.”

  “Well, Liam will be with us too, and I know you trust him.”

  “Do I trust him? Yes. Do I trust him with you? The jury’s still out.”

  I took another bite and wiped some juice that ran down my chin. “Well, you know Henry’s not into me. He’s been pining over Rachel this whole time.”

  “I’ll agree with you there. When in doubt, stick with Henry.”

  I laughed. “Please never change.”

  “The same goes for you. You’re going to be okay. All jokes aside, I’m glad you’ll have three Guardians with you.”

  “Me too.” Although I tried to act calm, I had learned the hard way about the dangers in Energo. I wouldn’t want to travel alone.

  Monty joined us. “Kevin, I’m about ready to go.” He’d shaved, and he finally looked like my uncle again. I knew facial hair was the thing in Energo, but Monty would always look funny to me with a beard. The same could be said for Kevin and Liam—but they’d shaved the second they had the chance. Monty usually waited until it was a full beard.

  He must have caught me staring. “Do I have anything on my face?”

  “No… but that’s kind of the point. You’re not fuzzy anymore.”

  “I figured if I was going back to civilization, I might as well look th
e part.”

  I checked out his black cotton outfit. “You think you look the part?”

  “Very funny. Have you looked at yourself lately?”

  My long red dress was comfortable but not even remotely practical. I missed jeans. “Don’t rub it in.”

  “You look beautiful in that dress.” Calvin came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. He was so comfortable with public displays like that, but I still felt strange—especially with Liam around.

  I gave in and leaned back against Calvin. “Of course you’d say that.”

  He didn’t seem to mind the way Kevin rolled his eyes before walking away.

  “I have a surprise for you.” Calvin lightly kissed my neck, keeping his lips there for a moment longer than I expected. The contact made me shiver with a mix of nerves and anticipation.

  I turned to look at him. “Really?”

  He held out a package wrapped in parchment.

  I ripped it open to find a pair of black pants and a shirt similar to what Samantha wore. “Thanks so much!”

  “Blake’s men are going to recognize us no matter what you are wearing. You might as well be comfortable. But you do not have me to thank.”

  “I don’t?”

  “Nope. Samantha insisted on it.”

  I spotted Samantha’s blond hair a little ways off and excused myself to go talk to her. I stopped a few beds down from where she stood. “Hey.”

  She looked up from packing some supplies. “Oh. Hi, Charlotte.”

  I held out the new clothes. “Thanks for these.”

  “It is nothing. It just seemed silly that they were making you wear dresses. No one is going to be fooled.”

  “I appreciate it.”

  She smiled. “Any advice for me? I am about to enter unchartered territory myself.”

  I was tempted to give her a warning about my brother but kept to the question she really asked. “Just be prepared for people acting differently. Men aren’t exactly as respectful there. If you want to blend in, take some clothes from my closet.”

  “Oh, great. I did not even think of that. I would stand out in this?” She gestured at her black pants and white top.

  “Yeah… although boots are in this time of year.”

  She laughed lightly. “I wish we were going together. It would be nice to have another girl around.”

  “I completely agree. We’ll have to hang out when this is all over.” It still felt strange yet awesome to like a girl my brother was dating—if one could call it dating. I wasn’t sure what was going on with them.

  “Definitely. Be safe.”

  “Same to you.” I reached out awkwardly to hug her.

  She returned the hug just as awkwardly. “Bye.” She smiled before walking away.

  Kevin walked over as soon as she disappeared from sight. I wondered if that was intentional.

  “I guess this is it.” He gave me a huge bear hug, lifting me slightly off the floor. “Take care of yourself. Be strong.”

  “Same to you.” I tried to hold back the tears that threatened to spill. I hoped it wouldn’t be the last time we would see each other, and I forced myself to be strong.

  We stood there silently as we waited for Mom and Monty to join us. I was really getting tired of all the goodbyes.

  Monty swung me around as he always did. At least some things never changed. “Don’t do anything crazy.”

  Mom gave me the biggest hug yet. “You can do this, Charlotte.”

  I didn’t want to let go of her. Our time apart had made me need her more, both as my mom, and as the former Essence.

  Calvin took my hand, giving me a sympathetic smile. “You ready?”

  He’d been away from his family for months; I wondered if it was hard on him, too. At least I wasn’t saying goodbye to Calvin. I didn’t think I could handle that again.

  “Yes.” I waved goodbye to everyone and let Calvin lead me to the horses. There were only three. “I’m guessing that means we’re riding together?”

  “I would prefer to have you close.”

  “Sounds good.” I definitely didn’t mind. I never felt safer or happier than when I was with him.

  Liam and Henry were already waiting for us.

  “Ready for another adventure, Char?” Liam asked.

  “Another? We’ve had one before?”

  Henry laughed. “This is going to be interesting.”

  Calvin helped me into the saddle, and we were off.

  Chapter Three

  Kevin

  Saying goodbye to Charlotte was becoming second nature. I knew that adult siblings weren’t supposed to see each other all the time, but it was getting a little ridiculous. I understood why we had to do our own parts, but I just wished that for once we could have been in the same world together. While Charlotte was looking for the scroll, I had to find some sort of stone called the Onyx. No one knew much about it, but supposedly some ancestor of mine hid it in the lost world around the same time the scroll was written.

  I guessed that world had been lost a long time. I had no clue what the thing looked like. A stone could be a lot of different shapes and sizes, but Monty seemed confident we’d know it if we saw it. Plus, my dad was supposed to be an expert on it. In theory, the stone was supposed to hold some incredible power, and if used correctly, it could destroy Blake. Without the knowledge, it was useless, which was why Charlotte was looking for the scroll. Just as Charlotte was the only one who could get the scroll, a Winthrop Guardian had to retrieve the Onyx. For better or worse, I was the only one who fit the bill.

  “You ready?” Samantha asked impatiently as I finished packing my backpack.

  Taking the few things I had from the cave was kind of dumb since I could get anything I needed at my house in Charleston, but I didn’t like leaving things behind. “Yeah, let’s do this.”

  Monty and Talen had already gone ahead to make sure the gate was unguarded. I didn’t mind. I liked having the time alone with Samantha.

  “How long is the trip to Alaska going to be?” she asked.

  “Both flights, combined with the layover, add up to about ten hours or so.”

  “Flights. I still can’t picture it.”

  “It’s pretty cool. I think you’ll like it.” I was excited to show her my world. In Energo, and even in Alak, she had the upper hand. I was the novice who had no idea what he was doing. It would be nice to be the one with a clue.

  She got that cold, steely expression. “It does not matter whether I like it. If it gets us to the Onyx, it is worth it.”

  I smiled. “You really are single-minded.”

  “So are you.” Her half-smile let me know exactly what she was referring to.

  “I think of plenty more than that.” True, I thought about Samantha a lot, but I didn’t let it get in the way of other things.

  She crossed her arms. “Remember what I said in Alak. If it interferes with our mission, it is over.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” I mock-saluted.

  She shook her head. “I do not know what I see in you.”

  “Sure you do. It’s my charm and good looks.”

  “Maybe the good looks part.” She blushed—a very rare occurrence.

  “I’ll take it for now. You ready?”

  “I have been waiting on you for ten minutes already.” She slung her pack on her back and headed toward the exit.

  “Yeah, yeah.”

  The sun was high in the sky when we walked out of the cave. If things went well, we’d be back in Charleston by the time the sun set in Energo, which would be sunrise back home.

  Samantha walked next to me as we hiked through the fern grotto. “Did you have any idea your father was looking for the Onyx?”

  We’d have to cross plains next before hitting a more temperate forest. I’d only made the journey to this gate once, but I remembered it well. “No. Honestly, I was pissed at him for closing us out.” Pissed was putting it mildly. My relationship with my father had gone from bad to wors
e our last year in Alaska.

  “You were lucky to have your father.”

  “I’m sorry.” I probably sounded like a whiny idiot. At least I had parents.